A few weeks ago, on a quite humid and warm afternoon, my two friends and I were having lunch at a small cafe in Izmir. We talked about travels, trips, memories, and of course, where we wanted to explore next. I told my friends that I love working more than traveling and, as expected, their expression was like, โWhat? But you work in the travel industry!!!โ
Well, this was not the first time I had heard such a comment. In general, people love traveling, so of course, when they hear something like this, especially from someone who appears to be curious like me, they have to express their surprise.
That conversation brought me back to the six- or seven-year-old me.
Back then, I didnโt know what travel meant. For me, it was spending hours on a bus with my Aunt Six, and eventually, we would end up somewhere. We visited pagodas, made our prayers, sometimes shared a small room with other people overnight, and then went home. Now, I know what that was โ it was called pilgrimage.
The little me was only looking forward to getting some local specialties on the way back, such as Nem, coconut candies, or coconut crackers. For my aunt, these trips were where hopes lived. She made a lot of prayers to Buddha, and that gave her hope that things would get better for her and for our families.
Sometimes, I hated those trips because we always had to get up so early, and I never knew when we would arrive or what we would do next. Not to mention, the bus was always jam-packed. But now, looking back, I miss them. And I miss my aunt too.
When I grew a little bigger, attending college and stuff, travels were no longer those trips. They were trips I did because I saw my friends doing them. Trips to places where I didnโt have to visit only pagodas. Spontaneous trips because my ex-boyfriend and I decided to just ride our motorbike to the beach in the middle of the night. Or trips that were simply for โshowing offโ materials โ photos with silly captions on Facebook or Instagram.
And then, when I started working, travels became part of my day-to-day professional life: inspections, FAM trips, and so on. There were also trips simply to show that, โLook, I am working and having a good life now.โ Or trips to show that I was staying at top-notch 5-star hotels, just to create more credibility for my work experience.
It wouldnโt be fair to say that I never enjoyed anything. That wasnโt true. My best friend and I did have a few trips where we explored new places and had a lot of good laughsโฆ and of course, plenty of photos to check in, as we were still in our early 20s. That was the time I still loved airplanes and airports.
Then I moved to Europe and traveled more. This time, it wasnโt because of work, but more for fun, and simply to take advantage of my time in this beautiful continent. I remember I traveled almost every month, sometimes twice a month. I loved running to the train station with my travel mate, quickly grabbing our coffee, and slowly enjoying it after we found a seat on the train. We loved train travels. I still do.
That was also the time when I started dusting off this blog and redesigned the whole thing. I wrote a lot about my trips and what I learned along the way, mainly about kindness and how life always had a better plan for us. I started to add flags to my blog posts just to show how many countries I had been to. Again, I guess it was me showing off hahaha.
All the blog posts during this period were about how much I could learn from interacting with people. Normally, people were just very kind, nice, and open. If you asked for help, no one would say no. I learned a lot. I also learned more about myself and my travel mate(s).
The last post about my travels was about Tejeda. That was almost three years ago.
Have I still been traveling? Yes, I have.
But I was no longer writing about my experiences. I guess it was simply because I realized that traveling is actually tiring too, and I started asking myself, โHey, do you really love traveling? Why do you travel?โ
And I didnโt want to write about this aspect. I didnโt have the answers, so I stopped writing travel blog posts. But now I am doing exactly that. Because I think I haveโฆ answers to these questions now. Not crystal clear, but yes, I have something to write about besides just listing places I have been to.
The first thing I did when these questions appeared a few years ago was to log in to this blog and delete all the flags I had listed here. I realized I was never proud of that. I just did it because I wanted to show something. Maybe that I was a seasoned traveler, or that I was a very curious creature, or that I was interesting because look, I had been to this many countries. But I felt none of these.
When I reflected, I also realized that I had never simply planned a trip purely because I wanted to go there. Out of curiosity. Out of my own interests. A trip for me.
It had always been because of something else: to impress someone, to make use of the time I was in a certain place, to accommodate, to accompany, to face some hard truths I had been avoiding, or to escape the difficult reality I was in. But donโt get me wrong, I do enjoy being in a new place and exploring new things.
The more I traveled, the more I realized how much I enjoy being at home, petting and talking to my cat, making my own coffee in the morning, and sipping it while checking emails and completing my tasks for the day. I love having a cozy dinner, then a lazy evening watching something nonsense or nice, or reading a few pages of a random book before sleeping. I just LOVE this. Or maybe I’m getting old hahaha
Since I stopped writing about my travels, I have been fortunate enough to visit many more places and try many, many good restaurants, from street stalls to Michelin-starred ones. But nothing beats a warm dinner I made for myself. I have also had countless great conversations with people I met, and those conversations helped me understand the world so much more. At the same time, they made me realize how little time I spend understanding myself.
So, do I really love traveling?
I donโt even know. What I know is that I will continue traveling. And if we play a game of A or B, I can definitely give you a better answer.
Traveling or working? Working, for sure.
Traveling or sleeping? Sleeping, for sure.
Traveling or gym? Traveling hahaha
And why do I travel?
There are obviously soooooo many reasons. And I hope next time, when I pack my bags, I will be filled with excitement and pure curiosity about what I will be able to see. A trip for me. And for me only.
Just that.
A few things that stayed with me from my travels in the past few yearsโฆ
I have never seen water more beautiful than the water in Mallorca.
I never thought the moment I felt most in love would be when I looked at my person with sweat and dust after a long day under the sun on a bus ride, and thought this experience was the most beautiful thing. Ever.
Fusion Vietnamese food in Prague tasted better than anything similar I had in Vietnam! How surprising.
I never thought I loved dumplings that much until I tried pierogi.
The best spaghetti is spaghetti al pomodoro!
The second-best street food I have tasted so far is definitely Balฤฑk ekmek. And the best street food is, of course, Vietnamese hehehe.
I was so sleeepyyyy when I visited Bellagio. Unfortunately, that was the only thing I remember.
Below are a few photos I love, without captions because I aaaaam just toooo lazy to sort them. But when I look at each of them, I know exactly how I felt, what kind of conversation I had, and with whom. So I guess these are important moments in my life that I want to remember ๐
